Brandon ‘The Assassin’ is dropping knees like confetti — who’s ready to party with The Dragon at the weigh-in?
Morning lads, just chillin’ in the kitchen with a brew, can’t stop grinning like a loon thinking about The Dragon strutting around with that fire in his eyes 🔥🔥 who’s gaggin’ to see ole ‘The Assassin’ tear it up tonight eh? heard Khan’s corner got all huffy when Oleksiak rolled in early smelling like roses already 🌹😂 8pm et shindig starts soon, gonna plug the telly in the pub so the lads can back them all day 💪🍻 who else gassed up for a proper Mexican standoff?
On the terraces since I was a kid.
got home late last night after locking up the shop, plopped onto the couch and there it was—Brandon on some late-night show in mexico, knees like cannonballs, laughing right into the camera like he already knew the scoreboard was rigged in his favor 😂 good lord, remember when he used to dance around the octagon like a nervous kid with a secret? now he struts like he owns the place, no umbrella needed just pure sky-clearing confidence
Been here longer than some have followed.
Man the way Khan’s team looked at Oleksiak like he just walked into their best mate’s wedding in flip flops lol 🤣 bet their diaries were packed with “family dinner, local gym sparring, then surprise catchweights” 🌹😭 when ole just turned up sipping a corona like “this your cardio mate?” 8pm et can’t come quick enough now The Dragon’s knees got their own playlist 🎶💀
Morning ya bunch of nutters! Sam’s still baking in the kitchen with his brew eh? Classic, remind me never to visit or I’ll get secondhand caffeine jitters 😂 Bet his missus is dead chuffed with all the knee-dropping confetti on the walls after tonight 💥 And Zoe, you’re out there counting stock at the shop while we’re all cosied up in the pub—proper sacrifices for the cause 🙌 Ride’s right about the diaries though, Khan’s team looking like they’ve just been told the pub’s got a new karaoke singer 😭 8pm ET, telly’s already screaming his name in mine—The Assassin’s gonna turn that weigh-in into a rave 🎶🔥 Come on ya madlads, crack open another one, this is gonna be legendary ah well, nowt to do
On the terraces since I was a kid.
Newcastle’s got me in a chokehold already 😂 my mate’s just texted me ten memes of Khan’s team trying to act casual while Oleksiak’s just strolling in like he’s here for the nachos
ran into oleksiak’s old mate at the offy round the corner this arvo—turns out the bloke’s been training with him proper since those mexican gym days, reckons ole’s knees drop faster than his pint glass after a full shift on the brew line 🌹😄 said he clocked the way ole strolled in tonight like he was picking up a takeaway order from his nan, no time for anyone’s nonsense
Seen it all, lads.
right, so oleksiak just walks in like he's doing the weekly shop and next thing you know the weigh-in's turned into a tango competition with khan's team getting stepped all over 😂 and brandon? still got those knees packed tight like he's headed out to a proper knees-out fiesta 🎉 imagine being that confident you don’t even need an umbrella in mexico city midday sun—classic showman stuff. remember when the lad used to shuffle around like he’d had one too many piñatas at his own party? now he’s the one making the confetti fly 💥 no wonder khan’s lot look like they’ve been told the buffet’s shut early tonight—proper ambush of joy incoming i reckon. pub’s already buzzing here, telly’s got that glow like it’s christmas morning and we’re all just kids waiting for the presents to unwrap under the tree. so tell me lads, who’s still finishing their pint while trying to act cool as the dragon’s knees get ready to drop?
Remember when the grass was greener 🌱