Brandon "The Assassin" Moreno about to pull off another body-shot masterpiece—who’s ready…
you lot ready for another banger tonight? brandon’s in there gonna carve ‘em up again, just watch 🔥 gonna scream so hard my voice’ll pack it in by round 3! who’s gonna get tickets? who’s watching at the pub? me mate’s got the beers on ice already 🍻
You don't abandon your own.
feeling like a kid on christmas morning knowing that man’s gonna walk out there and make someone’s ribs pay rent for a few minutes
Remember when the grass was greener 🌱
y’all bringing walkie talkies to the pub or just vibes + one person screaming into a beer can like "SPEAK UP I CAN’T HEAR THE KNOCKOUT" 🤣🍻 funny enough, mate’s got the beers on ice so our larynx countdown starts at 3 pints deep
Only serious one here — barely.
Ffs I’m already at 5 pints just thinking about it how’s y’all not flat on the floor yet 🍻🤬 whole pub gonna be singing "ribs rent paid" by 10pm bruv who’s bringing the extra lungs cos my voice gone last night after McGregor
Heart with the team, head on pause.
Man, I left work early just to bookmark this fight on my TV cos my lad’s already on about "Dad we’re hosting the Moreno supporters club at ours!" 😤💪 whole living room got streamers up and the kiddos printed his face on colouring sheets—youngest keeps shouting "Assassin gonna assassinate the ribs!" through his inhaler and we haven’t even opened the beers yet!
heard we bringing lung-power or just god tier hangover voices cos my mate’s asthmatic inhaler was confiscated at the door for “safety reasons” 😂🤣 now we just yell with the strength of 14 pints and a desperate need to clear his barred lungs
Hold my pint.
you see that Dave_Fan’s lad with the colouring sheets? mine’s got the Moreno flag as a blanket now he’s scared of the monster under his bed being Brandon 😂 gonna hear "DADDY THE ASSASSIN IS GONNA ASSASSINATE EVEN THE DARK!" all night before the fight even starts, proper next gen fan energy 🔥💪 who’s got the kids wearing Assassin merch already?! my niece insists her teddy’s got the same face painted on—priorities sorted
bruv @InjuryTimeFC87 your niece just peaked the family legacy with that teddy nightmare fuel 😂💀 but fr who said Assassin needs ribs when he can just eye-fuck a spine out the cage @JackArmy mate’s counting pub larynxes like they’re tax deductions and @Dave_Fan your lad’s colouring sheets better come with Asmr instructions cos "Assassin gonna assassinate" on loop through an inhaler is either genius or straight child abuse lol
Hold my pint.
man if you think tonight’s gonna be anything short of a bloody opera house with all the lungs in the house singing for ribs rent paid then you clearly forgot what happened last time he stepped in there lol my old man still has nightmares about the neighbour complaining about the serenade at 3am and now every pub within 50 clicks knows "Assassin” in a quiet voice means clear the dance floor 😄
my own lot’s already set up shop in the living room with the good couch, the portable speaker blasting that intro walk like we’re at the arena and the takeaway menu on speed dial cos there ain’t no way we’re making it to the post-fight meal without ordering early — heard my daughter practicing her “yeah boy” every time she mic’d up her stuffed panda and honestly if Brandon hears that through the tv feed he’s gonna grin before he even walks out
but seriously though let’s get these votes in so he starts proper and not just in our hearts cos the universe owes us a body-shot chorus that shakes the foundations of the building, ah well
Been here longer than some have followed.