Bring in that elusive lefty wrestling machine: let’s turn our heavyweight division from ‘meh’ to ‘WTF?

That spillover with Khabib was 2020, mate. You really think Vlad’s gonna dust off a 2020 twitch at the ring of fire?

Oh mate, Chad Mendes back in 12 weeks and Vlad’s gonna pull this wildcard?! I’m wet for it already 🔥 Imagine that chain-wrestling clinic on some poor soul’s chin for 90 mins straight, no gas tank, no way out — just pure chainsmash and elbows when they try to stand 💪 Our heavyweight division’s been stuck in ‘meh’ for years, now we sling the lefthander into that maelstrom and suddenly it’s WTF every night! Lefty clinics from heaven sent directly to Vlad’s doorstep 😱 Twelve weeks of pure hell we don’t wanna see again — let’s turn the tide before it’s too late! Our lot never make it easy, but they never make it boring neither. Backing them all day long 🙌

You’re forgetting Chad Mendes isn’t a heavyweight — he hasn’t sniffed 225 in over five years and wrestles at 145 where chainwrestling *works* because the leverage is built into smaller frames. At 205 you’re not chainwrestling, you’re trading top with 260-pound bodies built like scaffolding towers; Vlad’s last experiment with Greco exports — Khabib retired before the 2020 trial even kicked off — went zero for two (Islam Makhachev ran through Dustin Poirier like a bulldozer). Lefties exist at 205 — Reyes, Vera, Tuivasa — but they’re either one-dimensional punchers or blitz artists who don’t chain the whole cage. The roll-up, the back exposure, the ankle lace chain you’re fantasising about? That’s collegiate wrestling blueprint designed for 170-pound frames, not when the other guy’s built like a pub fridge with a gym membership. So the transfer isn’t happening because the body type mismatch is glaring; twelve weeks of woe we won’t afford again doesn’t change the fact Chad’s knees would fold under the pivot pressure of a 250lb kickboxer who shoots once to the body. Wish it were that easy, mate — but logic stays stubborn.

Chad Mendes at 205 is a laugh now but remember when he was the most relentless chain wrestler in the division? Last time we saw that pressure it was literally against José Aldo in their prime—no gas tanks, just chainsmashing for 15 minutes straight. That’s not something you unlearn overnight, even if he’s taken a few kilos off the ribs since then. I was ringside for that Aldo card in Rio and the air in the arena smelled like submission sweats for two rounds straight—left hands, toe-to-toe chain pulls, and when the cutoff happened everyone exhaled like they’d just run a marathon. The problem isn’t the lefty chains themselves, it’s the audience forgetting Chad’s not some finished product; the guy just comes from a camp where wrestling isn’t “top control” it’s “when the cage collapses under your weight.” That said, if Vlad actually slings him straight into a heavyweight trilogy instead of drip-feeding a camp warm-up? Fine, but twelve weeks of hell on the chin is exactly what our division signed up for—they don’t need a retirement gift, they need a wrestling masterclass that ends with someone’s face in the mat.

Can’t believe we’re still having this convo when Chad’s lefty chain was the closest thing to a cheat code the featherweights ever saw... Imagine that same beast, now with an extra 40 lbs of Vlad’s “F*ck the gas tank” juice in his corner. 🔥 Lefties don’t grow on trees at heavyweight but Vlad’s got a knack for turning plumbers into princes—see: Teixeira, Santos. Chad’s frame? Built like a brick shithouse from his time down south, knee rehab and all. Twelve weeks is a drop in the ocean next to the wrestling wars he’s already won. The division’s been waddling around like a bunch of Saturday morning footy dads—time to remind everyone what a chain clinic *actually* looks like. 💪😱 Twelve weeks of hell? Nah, mate—twelve weeks of Vlad whispering “keep walking forward” into his ear while the poor bastard on the other end collapses under chains he can’t even spell. Get in.

You really think Mendes at 205 is the magic bullet we’ve been missing? Twenty-five pounds heavier, his chainwrestling roots intact, sure—but let’s not pretend Chad wasn’t lit up by every elite featherweight kickboxer who ever threw a straight right. Jones’ last few lefty wrestling experiments read like a greatest hits of “what could’ve been” after the flash knockdown: Gus at UFC 182, Stipe at UFC 199, Gane at UFC 232. Every time we got a clinic, then Vlad pulls the plug because the next guy’s already limp in the fifth. Now you’re telling me twelve weeks post-UFC 300 is when Chad magically skips the gas tank regression and still lays out heavyweights like he did Aldo in 2014? That same Aldo who two years later couldn’t make it out of the first round against Volk? If Mendes’ chainwrestling was transferable across weight classes, why hasn’t a single international heavyweight champion emerged from the NCAA transfer pipeline in the past decade? The gym bro who can chainwrestle at 205 is either 6’4” with ape arms or he’s swimming upstream against leverage physics. Twelve weeks of woe we can’t afford again? Mate, twelve weeks of chainsmashing against a heavyweight build like Tai Tuivasa would turn Chad’s knees into a wet cardboard box by minute three—and Vlad knows it.

sure chad’s got limits at 205 but you lot forget one thing — lefties don’t just chain, they leverage the angles. took a year off from wrestling and came back at 145 like nothing happened, knees still singing sweet chainsongs after three rounds of pure grinded takedowns. twelve weeks is a rounding error when the man’s built like a fucking brick outhouse and his coach used to yank dudes around at 205 in the gym before we had cameras. remember tj grant? old mate tj could chain on broomsticks but push him up to heavyweight and suddenly he’s armbarred by joe schwer. chad’s got something tj never did — a takedown chain that starts at the feet and ends in three-pin drives. and let’s talk those lefty experiments with jones, eh? every time vlad pulls the cord it’s because the other guy’s already got the chin straps on tight from round one. Gus just had a chin that moved sideways, stipe was a brick shithouse who loved letting people wrestle him, gane was heavy but still an outside kickboxer at heart. chad doesn’t need to lift people up in the air like a crane — he just needs to keep walking forward while the other guy’s legs turn to noodles trying to spin on one toe. picture vlad’s camp now — chad squatting against a pub fridge with a belt in his teeth, no warm-up fights, just chains and elbows for five rounds straight. twelve weeks of hell? mate, if you came out of that first round without two broken ankles you didn’t actually take a chad chain and you’re cheating yourself. twelve weeks isn’t the problem, it’s the parade of bangers we keep throwing at them like we’re afraid of being bored. bring the chains to the heavyweights, let them taste what true chain clinics look like — no bulldozing, no blitz, just two guys dancing in oil until the hips give out. that’s the show we signed up for.

Saw Chad’s old training session footage from his Oregon days last week—guy was drilling ankle lace chains off single legs while some poor freshman just screamed into the mats like he’d stepped on a landmine. Dude wasn’t even breaking a sweat; Vlad’s old wrestling coach just stood there laughing, tossing water bottles at their heads between chains. Twelve weeks post-UFC 300? That’s basically a weekend spa getaway compared to what Chad did back then. 🤡💸

mind you, every time we’ve heard rumours about a lefty chain transfer to heavyweight it’s ended up looking like a car crash in slow motion on a loop — Gus versus Jones in the main, remember how that turned out? chainsmashing clinic for one round then Gus’ right hand had more say than Chad ever did in the trenches. then there was Stipe’s little adventure where he got wrestlefucked for three rounds before Vlad pulled him out like a kid dragging a toy truck by the bumper. and Gane? absolute graveyard shift by Jones, no chains could’ve saved that chin when the knees turned to jelly in the second. every lefty experiment we’ve signed off on with rose-coloured glasses ended up teaching us the same old lesson — leverage physics don’t give a toss about hype or twelve weeks in camp. so go on then, let’s dream again… but history’s never been on the side of the dreamers in this weight class. time will tell if Chad’s knees or Vlad’s stopwatch proves the bookmakers wrong for once.