Makhachev ready to show another slick chokehold?

ahhh i’ve been clockin’ the time since he stepped off the bus in moscow, not even joking — had the stopwatch out my phone at 4am like some sad bastard waitin’ for a train. remember when he first pulled that same choke on poatan at the arena last year? man turned green as a frog before the ref even started pullin’ his arm off. this crowd’s gonna lose their minds if he does it again, mark my words

bleh i jus had a flashback to that one mcdonalds "contest" where u had to spot the chicken nugget shaped like McDonalds — all of us sat here staring at dat cage like it's gonna hatch into a *fourth round makchoke* emergency 🤣🍗 what’s the over/under on ref callin’ it at 2:59 and us all still w8nin like… "just let ‘im finish the choke!!!" 🏃‍♂️⏳

i’d take 3:01 every damn time if it means seein’ isa pull that choke 💀🔥 like watching someone drawin’ the funniest cartoon in real time, textbook sick 🎨 what’s the worst bet you’d take just to see a new one cooked up? last time he made poatan look like a stunned salad 🥗💚

Makes me laugh thinkin’ back to UAE last year when Isa’s choke just looked like he was ticklin’ Poatan 😭😭 wish I had a video of that moment saved on my phone cos I watch it every time I need a mood booster i swear

smelled the fear in the air last time that choke landed, and not just from the dude getting choked — the whole crowd’s breath caught mid-sip, mid-cheer, like the entire arena turned to stone for two seconds. it wasn’t the choke itself, it was the way he locks it in, slow as melting butter, then your brain just goes *oh* just as the tap happens — i swear, even the referees flinch the first time you see it in person, they’ve seen it so many times they still can’t look away.

Man that Poatan choke was *next level* nonsense, I still can’t believe some lad just stood there like a stunned salad while Isa made it look like he was giving him a head massage 😭💚 made me wanna try it on my mate in the pub after a few pints just to see his face, needless to say it backfired real quick 🤣 what’s the wildest place you reckon Isa could pull off that choke next? airport queue? tesco self-checkout?

remember that time in madrid when isa was on the eurosport couch doing that arm-in-arm interview with some muppet who kept going on about "the chess match" and you could see isa just losing the plot inside, fingers twitching like he was squeezing invisible necks between sentences? the camera caught it for half a second before they cut to a replay of his own last armbar and he just sat there with this tiny smirk like, yeah mate, i’ll show you a chess move alright…

Wait till you see what he does to Conor’s neck when they meet on US soil 😈 just imagine the man himself looking up at the lights like “nah bro, I’m good, I think we’re done here” while Isa just slowly tightens it up like he’s winding a clock 🔩💀 Speaking of necks, I still get shivers remembering that little zero-g choke he slapped on Beneil at UFC Paris last spring — didn’t even look like he broke a sweat, just strolled past and went “right, let’s call it a day” 🤣 keeps me awake at 2am watching that clip on loop.

yo this one’s easy—where was my wallet when Isa floated past Beneil like he was just sauntering to the fridge for a beer and suddenly someone’s name is on the card 😳💚 like watching gravity check out for five seconds flat

that moment in Paris… still gives me the odd chill thinking how Beneil just clocked out like a phone on 1% 😭 the way Isa’s grip didn’t even look like a grip, more like he’d reached over to turn down the room temperature 🥶 and *whoosh* fight over? the man’s left hand might as well come with a “tap me” sticker