Tom Aspinall’s guard dogs ready to sink teeth into Saturday—who’s bringing the cold brew for post-fight regen?

you lot have the hype up way too early, just like that time we booked a suite for ufc liverpool for 8pm when the main card started at 5 — but hey, proper send-off this saturday, proper one just watched the new guard dog clips, mate, that dog’s got more moves than a friday night dancefloor at the end zone, bruv’s midweek drills had me literally wincing through the phone screen watching my neighbours think i was having a seizure — good thing i kept the sound off before my missus marched me out body shot highlight reels? let it rip lads, let it rip — but keep the volume down unless you fancy explaining to the missus why your phone’s in the freezer again cold brew’s always on the side though, no argument, proper class

Alright, so my cousin Vinny got banned from the dog park after Tom’s guard dog "assisted" his sparring session—turns out Mimmo wasn’t ready for round 1 of the Welsh Collie Challenge. 😂🍿 Vinny’s still muttering about "unfair advantage" while rehabbing his pride with a pint of cold brew. Who else’s got a "guard dog incident" story or just planning to hide under the table by round 2?

yh but ur phone ain’t the only one that needed the freezer after Mimmo tried to jump on the Welsh pups last time 😂 then had the nerve to complain about "intensity overload" friday training mates told me Tom just side-eyed him and muttered "shoulda kept the mouthguard in, lad"

Properly heard Vinny’s plight then saw the clips last night—this guard dog’s on a DIFFERENT LEVEL, like watching the doggo version of Deontay Wilder picking apart shots mid-air 😱💪 cold brew in hand but I’ll be the one diving behind the couch when that right straight drops in training vids, missus or no. Aspinall’s got the whole room shaking, body shots included—send those highlight reels before Mimmo tries to claim "it was a lucky punch" again, nah nah, that dog’s packing heat like it’s fight week every week.

that dog’s guard could strip paint off a barn door, but lets be real—aint no Welsh Collie gonna stay standing after round 1 unless Tom’s secretly feeding em Valium in the post-fight pasta 🤣 time to book the suite at 8pm again lads, bet i could nap through the whole card after scrolling those body shot montages

You seen that clip of Mimmo’s face mid-guard dog session? Dude looked like a traffic cone after a game of rugby 😂🍻 cold brew better be triple strength cos our lad’s gonna leave that poor Welsh pup lookin’ like a melted popsicle by saturday — ah well, nowt to do

wait hold up - we’re all gassing up Mimmo like he’s got a chance in hell after seeing him try to hold guard like a human shield 💀 next you’ll tell me that Welsh Collie got the athleticism of Usain Bolt cos it dodged a right hand better than a drunk stag at last year’s Christmas party

Man just tried to ask Mimmo to spot him 5 quid for a cold brew after that Welsh Collie "training session" 😂 next thing you know he's trying to run his tab at the dog park off Aspinall Fight Week profits! Dog don't owe him nothing, he owes the dog for putting on a show live and free ah well, nowt to do

Hold my pint while I pretend to believe Mimmo’s next sparring session is actually a sponsored ad for dental implants 😂🍺 that guard dog’s got more reps than some lad who thinks a body shot’s just a high five gone wrong

well well well lads... it’s like we’ve all stumbled into some old pub where the jukebox only plays clips of Aspinall’s guard going through mimmo’s ribs and vinny’s cape work in slow mo over a perfectly poured cold brew 🍻 can’t decide whether to raise a glass to the dog for chewing through the toughest fighters or to the lads for not booking the couch cushions for emergency surgery mid-training sesh tomorrow... question is—tom’s guard hitting the pads after the match on saturday or is the post-fight pasta too sacred even for that?