Tom ‘The Bomb’ Aspinall is gonna explode on Saturday and we’re all paying for therapy seats at the arena!
Cmon lads, who’s still rubbing sleep from the eyes this morn?! Gonna be EPIC on Sat 💥 Pre-gaming already while flipping pancakes 🥞 The Bomb’s gonna LIGHT IT UP ayy! Anyone else got that first round KO running round their heads or nah? Early doors cheese 🧀🔥
Heart with the team, head on pause.
ever catch yourself humming the walkout music on a random tuesday like it’s 2019 again? 🧸 saturday is gonna feel like christmas, new jersey snow, and the first round slam all rolled into one heavy night cap. had my ritual lucky mint in the pocket since wednesday—don’t ask me why, just feels right when the bomb’s due. remember the old times when we’d huddle round the cracked radio in the fan zone just praying for a proper english voice to break the bad news late at night? now we’re the ones with the comfy seats and enough cushion stock to absorb whatever kinetic energy the lad’s right hand carries. first round ko on the brain like a bad earworm you can’t scrub out—terrace’s pancake flips are still hanging in the kitchen, guilty as charged. bring extra ice, stock up the snack drawer, and clear the schedule like it’s a bank holiday weekend; this one’s going straight to the highlight reel no matter what. ah well, we’ll see
Been here longer than some have followed.
eh what’s the beef with cushions anyway — we’re not gonna *need* ‘em amirite 😂🧸 think my gran’s gonna sit on hers the whole night like a proper grandma at the cinema blocking my view of The Bomb’s left cross 💥🔥
Hold my pint.
yeah nah mate don’t be so cocky with the cushion cracks 🧸 where’s your faith?! first round KO? PLS we’re missing the point—imagine the wall-to-wall left hand in the first 30 seconds that flattens the guy, then you’ll need at least three cushions stacked like Jenga just to feel comfy watching the replay 😂🔥 and if Gran’s got dibs on the seat I’m bringing *my* nan who swings louder than Aspinall’s right hook—she’ll clear the row before round one’s over 🏆 pancakes AND pasties in the backpack, bet Terrace won’t share either 🥞🍴
On the terraces since I was a kid.
first round? try first 12 seconds mate, got a 3 month old clip of him warming up in my head on loop right now, arms swinging like two wrecking balls 🚀💥 nan's bringing her knitting cos she’s knitting a cushion AFTER he knocks him out just to have a keepsake, pancakes got nothing on her pastry 🍴 magic, absolute magic, sat waiting in the queue at 5am already ♥️
On the terraces since I was a kid.
that toddler swinging their arms video u got on loop? lads mate that’s just him testing if the warm-up ropes double as a wrecking ball after knocking his Cornflakes off the sideboard 🤣 imagine telling that to the ref “sorry guv, hadda make sure the ring’s structurally sound before Tom gets in” or you’ll miss the nan knitting 3 cushions live off the rip cos she’s literally doing the macrame equivalent of a wheel kick 🧵🔨 nah but fr this is the squad that turns a prelim bout into a family reunion with snacks and cushion diplomacy — who even needs therapy when u can buy shares in beanbag futures from the arena gift shop 🏆💸
what do we say to prelim fighters when they line up? "here’s your cushion, mate, and good luck with the combover" 😂💀 nah but fersure The Bomb’s gonna make this lot look like they’ve been on a tea break cos he turns up with more intent than a toddler on a sugar crash
Heart with the team, head on pause.
first round ko? mate we’re getting greedy now 😂 the lad’s only warming up with a jab, remember when he took 10 minutes to stretch in the first round last time? grandma’s already ordering a second cushion before the ref’s even called “fight” 🧸💥 next thing you know she’ll start a knitting circle in the stands cos “it’s tradition” and we’re all out here for pancakes not crochet sessions 🥞🧵 nah but fr this squad’s softest members are somehow always the first to volunteer for cushion duty — who’s checking the purse strings when nan decides “one cushion just isn’t artsy enough” 💸
y’wot Sam mate!! 😂 nan’s bringing her knitting BUT did we mention she’s got a *wheelchair* cushion already pre-cushioned like a tiny velvet throne for when Tom decapitates the first guy in 6 ticks flat 🦾🔥 and she’s stitching on a little "Tommy’s KO Fund" patch right now so she can auction it off for more pasties—therapy seats? nah mate, this is *investment* seating we’re talking!!! who’s queuing with gran & nan cos by 8am this lot’ll have turned the arena concourse into a craft fair with syrup-soaked pancake aromas and knitting needles flying like a flyweight division of grandmas 🧵🥞✨
Heart with the team, head on pause.
listened to the lift doors in my tower block last week and swear i heard metal *screaming* — then remembered it was just tom’s warm-up arms smashing the sides on the way down… took me back to saturday, same noise but louder
Remember when the grass was greener 🌱